Life's Sick Lil' Games...

Yep...indeed it is! My mom's not gonna be here this frickin' Christmas! She goes to East Malaysia for a month on the 13 of December...OMG, she's not even gonna be here on New Year's Eve!

I'm hating xmas already...

How am I gonna cope? My poor baby sis, though...well, my poor mom's gonna be posted somewhere during the holidays, without her family. I so hate "the office" right now you have no idea. She even has to work OT (without the OT pay) since they got "new management"...I mean, isn't there labor laws regarding this? Hmmmpphh!!!

Just feeling bitter that my mom can't be here with us...it also doesn't help much to realize that you haven't gone anywhere to chillout...it's all like a big blur right now. And mom is constantly unwell. This year...man, i dunno...this year sucks, actually. I really pray that the next year would be my...i mean OUR year! I need some happy endings in my life. And so far, it's unhappy endings all the way. Just goes to show that you don't always get what you want!

I would lastly like to reiterate...

I HATE 2008...IT'S BEEN A SUCKY YEAR!!!

Thank you!

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What would you do if you were on a month's vacation out of uni, had no money, and your friends are busy with work or college?

I don't know...help!

So i have a few books to read...is that all i'm gonna do this time?

Plus! This just in: My mom's been posted in Sabah from the 15th of December-15th of January yet again!!! You know what that means, right?

No Christmas Eve, no Christmas spirit, no New Year's Eve...nada! Ok, ok...so it's better for the parents' finances coz it'll pay for the xmas extras. I've said many times to them that "I'm all for it!"...well, i was/am just being a good sport...I mean, it's a good thing...but I can't be selfish by showing my unhappiness. I just can't do that! Even my two youger sisters do not feel like I do, I can tell...

So why am I feeling this way? Maybe because my mom was the one who took care of me throughout my childhood (unlike my two siblings)...my middle sis was taken care of by a nanny since she was six or so...and the baby? Well, now it's dad's turn to be Mr. Mom. My dad was always the one who went to diff locations for work.

It's like the two switched places, which is funny. My dad works nights now. It's a family effort when it comes to taking care of baby...so we all have our share of responsibilities. C'mon, i'm 21, and my middle sister is 18...it's so much fun, though...so no complaints there...

Looking at my baby sister, it's like...I dunno. Sometimes I feel like it's surreal, maybe it's all a dream. It's like having a bundle of joy...or your very own living doll at home. I tell you, if it wasn't for baby A, we wouldn't be half as close as we are now. My middle sis' shenanigans have ceased to zilch, my dad has mellowed from his strict exterior, now showcasing a soft side...my mom? Whoah, she's a tiger now! Lol! Maybe the last two scenarios are brought on by hormones.

Back to the title...

What the heck am I supposed to do during this time off? Is this a foreshadow of a sucky xmas? Geez, the possibility of my mom not being here is already giving me a glimpse of a not-so-happy xmas! And New Year!

Shit!!! And...it will be my 22nd New Year (21st, technically)...OMG, why does time have to go on quickly? I didn't even have fun this year...I thought time flies when you're having fun?

And there's your whiny post, yet again. Til I get in the xmas spirit, I will not post another happy post! Feel free to pour in words of affirmations!

Toodlez, bitches!

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I must admit, this year, xmas sucks pretty bad! Despite having a new member in the family, our xmas is pretty dull...no baking cookies, no xmas shopping, nothing. Why? It's two things; my dad's brother passed away last Dec 28th...dad says, we should mourn for at least a year before we celebrate anything, xmas included. But in my mind, i think, aren't we celebrating the birth of our Lord?

Why deprive ourselves of the joyous birth of Christ? I dunno...the second thing is finances. This year has been pretty bad on all of us, financially. My dad is gonna take a drastic measure, and sell his music school. He has lost the passion of running his music school beacuse his so-called partners, ain't doin' a thing on their part... they're doing zip! My poor dad has been running about town since it opened few years back, and now, after countless times of trying to salvage his business, he's finally opted to close the school in hopes of a new project...i hope he makes it, coz he sure needs to get a break from all his tiresome stuff! May God be with him...

Another thing, i seriously would say, even before the date approaches, that xmas would suck big time this year, but then again, our luck could change...it changed a whole lot when we found out mom was pregnant, didn't it? I hope to find out more pleasant surprises soon. Thank God for babies...

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Well, seeing that the place I work for is a production company, it would be making a drama catered for TV.

Now I, for certain, do not watch our local TV shows coz, they suck (sorry)! Sometimes or rather most of the time, the actors can't act for nuts....always the same bloody expression on their not-really-made-for-TV-faces (sorry!)...

However, at least I would be watching how and what the bosses here are doing to produce something. That's what i'll learn from this job I have!

So far, i've made the layout of proposed cast and wardrobe stylings for the characters. Though, I wish I could stay longer JUST to see the show in the process of shooting and such, as this is just the early stage of production.

But, you know something? I'd rather go to college! Hehe...

I guess if the whole plan of joining the foreign service don't work out, I will probably join the media circuit, PR, writer, or something of that sort...it's also kinda nice to be a scriptwriter...in Hollywood, not here!

Honestly, there are a few movies that could offer some sort of competition with the foreign flicks...however, they're like a needle in a hay stack. Even most commercials suck in the idea bank! This one local ad for a beauty product gave out the message that a guy won't even look at a girl when she's dark-skinned, but wow...after she uses the product, she gets fairer-looking, and wham! The frickin idiot-guy asks her out? WTF?

BLATANT SEXISM AND PREJUDICE AGAINST DARK-SKINNED WOMEN, ASSHOLES!!!

These are the stupid ads they show on Malaysian TV! That ad had the women scorned was was pulled-out as soon as it aired (yeah, only after a lot complaints and write-ups in the papers!)...but God forbid, kissing scenes! The censor board must cut 'em out!

I want better Malaysian shows, movies, actors, music, commercials, literature...just be original, people!!! IMO, our counterparts, Indonesia and the Philippines, though economically not so OK like ours, they fare better in entertainment...and don't even get me started on Japan and South Korea...I mean, wow! They have their own everything, man!

We should all strive to do better for ourselves here, coz we sure as hell can do it if we really want!!! The problem is, there are no Tarantinos, Scorceses, Coppolas, etc here in Malaysia! And if there were peeps like them, who knows how far we'd go!

Meh, maybe i'm being too harsh...but then again, maybe not!

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I knew it...when it's dad who sends me to work, i'm a 100% sure i'll be late...today, I certainly was. 10 minutes late to be exact. It's not that anyone was in the office or anything, but I just need to be early, or on the dot, yo!

Yeah, i'm a real piece of work like that!

Watched Heroes last night. DAMN, it was great! My friend downloads the show, and catches the same episode that the U.S. does, but I can't...the server over here sucks. Plus, my comp RAM sucks too! Put 2 & 2 together...go figure. I'll just wait for Astro's prime time show...what the heck, eh? Ok, back to the show...

Ooohhh, looks like Sylar's power gets more powerful with every kill..oohhh! And yada yada yada! Can't wait, dudes! I'm a total Heroes junkie...and wasn't Hiro's story totally adorable? I recognized Charlie from that suck-ball movie called Epic Movie...she did great in the show.

Meh, i'm talking too much now. Better get back to work. Btw, to the only friend I can trust enough to read this...when are we gonna hang out, dude? I start freshman year in July...that's a long way to go!

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