Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Baking Cookies this Christmas...Who, Me?

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Yeah, unbelievable..But, i have to try. I will do it well, coz i follow instructions well, verbatim! So, this xmas, my grandma's pineapple tarts will be one of the main focus...What else, you say? I'm thinking chocolate macaroons, shortbread cookies, choc chip cookies...that's about it.

Mom will bake the choc and butter cakes...and flan...or rather, Leché Flan!!! Lol...Having some sort of xmas lunch for some friends, and looking forward to meeting my darling classmates. Miss them a lot, as we haven't chatted in weeks!

So, there...A day's useless rambling of a mad woman! Hope the cookies don't get burnt, crumbled, get too hard, tasteless, etc...Gawd, what the hell am i doing? Please let this work!!!

I love xmas time!

Friday, December 15, 2006

Wishing and Waiting

Friday, December 15, 2006

Here i am again...Waiting for something special to jump into my life! The previous post was that of an angry, bitter, mad teen! That being said, i can no longer use this excuse the next time i have an outburst...

How can this be? I'm 19, happy, free, single...but every time someone finds out i'm single, they go "Awww, you poor thing, don't worry...you'll find someone!"...Are you freaking kidding me? Wtf??? I'm happy, so shut up!

I would love to have someone to love and care for, despite not having any experience...But if i do not find a guy who is good enough, what's wrong with that? I'd rather wait than settle for someone i do not click with!

So, Santa dear, please give me the strength to face the idiots who keep giving me their fucked-up two-cents worth...ME - a perfectly flawed, smart, driven young girl, who doesn't need a man to complete her, but to complement her. Having said that, could you also find me the right guy before the new year approaches? Lol! Yeah, that would be a blast!

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Fucked-up Shit!

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Aaaarghhh...Why is it when things go well, it ends up slapping you in the face? Yeah, things are looking up now...Then, all of a sudden, it's trampled on like rotten tomatoes!!! OK, here's the deal, my hols started in its full gear, so now what? Everyone's doing something, going somewhere...So, what's left? Me. Alone. Doing nothing, achieving nothing...Zip! Nada! I'm like a lone star in the night, like a lonely canyon of the desert, like the only leaf on a tree...I'm all alone!

I hate it when there's lack of productivity in my life...Oh, by the way, had a fuckin' fight with my sister...Again! It's not like we don't ever fight, it's just that she keeps quarelling with her damn boyfriend every single day, every single night...About things as petty as not calling...Oh, you get the idea! It just pisses me off! Ok, i don't have a boyfriend, and i so hate people 'pitying' me just 'coz i don't have one. If this is what a relationship is - this fighting-every-day thing, i might as well resort to spinsterhood for the rest of my freakin' life!

So, what else is there? Well, the fact that i must be responsible for practically everybody's mistakes makes me wanna puke. Everytime my dad gets back from work, he scans the house...My mom and my sis? They leave their unwashed cups and saucers on the table...and what happens? Dad scolds me for letting the house get messy, while giving me a lecture on being neat and tidy...Wtf??? Well, don't let me get started on that subject...There's more, mind you...Most of 'em is what the eldest child of a family experiences. I'm practically the maid of the house - minus the wages!

I can't wait for xmas...Meanwhile, i'm broke as hell...Lent some money to my sister...Yeah, the very same day she said she couldn't care less about me...I'm used to all this shit, but it hurts me everytime, not because of me, but because of my parents...Her behavior is a reflection on the way my parents raised us, "the children"...And when she screams and shouts at me or anyone else, it seems like they didn't bring her up well. What the hell could i do? Advise her? Huh, she'll just keep calling me a bitch, and say i'm such a grandma and she couldn't care less about what i have to say...

Blatant disrespect is what i get! They say you have to give respect to gain it...Well, i'm living proof that this cliché is total bullshit! A daughter so loved by her family would do practically anything for her boyfriend, and yet, couldn't even have a family outing without some sort of bribe...That's being the perfect daughter for you! And me? I'm stuck here in my room, doing nothing productive, bitchin' and ravin' like a lunatic on meth, wishing for a savior, wishing her parents would appreciate her, wishing that her sister respects her, and wishing her friends could be free so that they could take her out for a day of fun, but alas...That is asking for the moon!

Monday, December 04, 2006

Just One...

Monday, December 04, 2006

Just one more day of insanity up ahead 'til I get over all the f***in' shizz that is Form 6! I feel sad, but free in a way...Today was the last day of exams for some of my friends. I must say, a few of them welled-up and i felt like that too, seein' that it's gonna be the last time i see them!

No matter how we say we will keep in touch, deep down i know that it's easier said than done...Friends i have come to know all go away in the end, and all you're left with are the memories and laughs that we have, or had, rather...

Well, this just goes to show that we don't call 'em clichés for nothing, right? Friends do come and go...it's the journey we take through life that we find the most weird and interesting bunch of friends...I'm so happy with all my friends now, i woudn't trade 'em for anyone else...Each is unique...My library of friends are filled with all sorts of head cases, LOL! God bless us all!

I'm now listening to my most favorite song, by my most favorite band..."Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zeppelin. It's a great song...hypnotizes me from beginning to the end...It sounds like i'm in a different era...you know, of psychedelic highs (brought-on by too much of pot!) and hippies...Love Robert Plant's banshee-like screech...Cool!