Life's Sick Lil' Games...

I just found out I won 4 movie tickets, yo!

Wow...my dad said, i'm a pretty good contestant in the stuff I join!

I say, it's pure luck! Maybe God has pity for me...you know, no boyfriend, always working without ever going out with friends...movie tickets ain't that big a deal, but you know, so far, i've won a bunch of stuff, and i'm happy with it!

Now, if I could only win Milo Ventimiglia and a scholarship to any Ivy League University, i'd be set for life!.............BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA, like as if!!!


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WARNING: EMO POST AHEAD...

I just hope that my dreams and ideals come true. I may have ideals, but i'm pretty realistic too! I know romance is just life imitating art, and it just wouldn't last after a few months together, unless you make the effort! Pretty soon, you get in the comfort zone, and you find yourself flossing your teeth in front of each other...but maybe, just maybe, that is what I need...Comfort (with someone)! Never felt that before...

A companion to go through life with me, experience the ups and downs with me, and we end up supporting each other...then, as far as you go, you find that you can't live without each other...that's how realistic I am.

Then my friends ask me to lower my standards...why should I? I have always had high hopes for love, life and ambition...I just can't seem to settle for less, and I don't know why! Is it wrong? Oh, man...

I was always confident in my future, and knew that my plans would follow through...now I find that life just isn't that way...you plan, and you plan, and you CERTAINLY DO plan, then what happens? Life takes a detour...takes a 180 degree turn! That's what's beginning to happen, study-wise. When i'm confident about something, the outcome would just disappoint me...


P.S.: Wow, from a chirpy-happy post, to an emo post...BIPOLAR ALERT!!!

P.P.S.: Well, at least I don't dress like an emo, or fancy the same music as them...eeewww!

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I wish I had a mute button for certain people. Some people can't just seem to shut the fuck up! Why is it, when you don't ask for their opinion, they just go on and on, and give it to you anyway? Man, that is soooo annoying!!!

Another thing is, what the hell is wrong with me being single? Why do people seem to think i'm miserable just because i'm single? Sometimes, I don't know what to think and what to do anymore...the thing is, i'm happy!!! So, why must I look for "Mr. Right" at the mere age of almost-20? I somehow think I would stumble upon a great guy, serendipitously...somewhere out there. Besides, my ideals on future relationships are much too idealistic.

I'm NOT an old woman, so please...can't you let me enjoy my youth? Being single and carefree is fun!!! I'm only 20 years old, damnit!!!

Wait, wait...one more thing! This is to men who can't take no for an answer; just because a girl ain't into you, doesn't mean she's not into guys, you egotistical twat! Maybe it's because you are a jerk, an asshole, a male-chauvinist pig, etc...so get the message, will you?

You know what? I might as well tell everyone i'm joining a convent to become a nun...or that i'm a lesbian...yeah, that would be so much easier and would probably shut them up!!! Or maybe that would invite more "opinions"? Oh, boy...here we go again!

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How nice it would be if my life was like a romantic comedy...LOL! Could you say Sleepless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally, and all the other rom-com shit? Gawd, that would be fun!!!

Having friends tell me i'm more likely to get killed by terrorists then finding somebody...then, out of sheer serendipity, i find Mr. Right! Or maybe he was in front of me and i didn't realize it until he was halfway around the world, then i would go after him...begging the flight attendant that i can't miss the plane coz i'm after the man i love? Yup, that would be just how i would want my life to be!

Alas, life does not imitate art...in my 20 years on this good Earth, i have only known a few decent guys...some of them gays, some are taken, some are friends (my principle: dating friends result in losing a friendship. Go figure!)...Some are after one thing, and that just makes me sick! Some think that they are all that! Some think that they can touch, grab, pinch, or jerk-off in front of young school-girls! Yeah, the latter happened to me before while i was getting home from school with a friend! What we both experienced was traumatizing...Not to mention, there was nothing much to look at, if you know what i mean...LOL!

The grabbing part happened before too, when i was around 13...yeah, a fugly motorcyclist played the "i'm lost" card and took advantage of a young girl's naivety by grabbing her boobs!

You know what's funny? The friend i was walking with earlier told me the same thing happened to her before too! Hahahaha...i guess that is why we both are very cynical towards men. We always think there's an ulterior motive when a guy tries to be all "nice" to us...

So now, what am i gonna do? Just let someone in? Hah, like it's that easy...Well, i hope that my cynicism will not drive me to utter loneliness and self-destruction. I so want the idea of the perfect man...Could it ever happen? Well, someone might prove me wrong, i hope!

All the best to girls (and guys) waiting for their ideals to become a reality!

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